He’s Just Not That Into You

Is That What We Get to Learn This Month.. Mmmm Maybe.. Maybe not

I just watched the movie He’s Just Not That Into You again.

It’s an old movie.I’ve seen it before.

But it was interesting that I didn’t see the same thing this time.

Years ago, I watched it without having a clue what it was really about. Justin Long plays the lead role in supporting the title as he “educates” love starved GG on “male behavior” and “manspeak.”

He even calls her a stalker. At first she’s crushed. And then she feels liberated and returns to share with her girlfriends what men mean when they don’t
A) Follow up after a date
B) Propose Marriage
C) Honor the requests inside a marriage.

And from there everything unravels. Not just for GG. As she begins to see more and more patterns in her reactions to every man - hoping “he’s the one” - she shares this new found knowledge. Until fear is shaping everyone’s perception with the same line.. 

whispering the lie: you aren’t enough — now, anymore, or ever - because if you were he would be acting differently

It’s actually a lighthearted view into how fear shapes our perception. And how longing - for what we “think” will make us happy - actually bends the reality of what could. 

The movie isn’t about men and how they play the field. It’s about all of us misreading energy when we are afraid to lose connection.

It’s about interpreting breadcrumbs as a feast.

And staying in stories that protect us from the ache of seeing what is.

Sometimes, he really isn’t that into you. And sometimes… you may not be that into him either.

Not because there is no chemistry. Not because there is no affection.

But because something in your body already knows the connection is not aligned —and you stay anyway, because being wanted feels better than being honest.

Welcome to the energy of February, where we kick off in the Gate of Wanting.. Gate 19, energy that intensifies the want to be wanted and need to be needed.

So, if you find yourself bending a bit, performing, not just for others, but for yourself, all in the driving desire to prove you are all that and a bag of chips.. 

Just smile.. And know that feeling is coming from pressure, not a misstep. 

Rather than seeking to soften the truth, or trying  to be “easier” to love.. Speak up.. 

Because that is where this “month of love” is taking us. 

Not into romance or fantasy… into truth, unvarnished, loving truth.

This is the month - February of 2026 - where illusion dissolves and love starts being a conversation about what is real. 

In the Alchemy Room, February’s theme is:

Unraveling Illusion — Intimacy Through Emotional Honesty

Don’t panic. It’s not about being angry or defiant or self righteous. It is not about confrontation, or walking out of your marriage, unless that is the right thing to do.

It is simply about clarity. 

It is the moment in the arc where denial softens and we stop pretending we don’t feel what we feel because we just can’t deny what we feel anymore. 

It’s the point where we recognize the cost of silence. We stop denying the bitterness, resentment or disappointment.

And it becomes a wonderful place where we get to ask ourselves what it is we expect from a partner. What are we asking him to be?

Who are we being in the relationship?

Clarity, truth, and honesty is the only way to be in relationship with someone. Not sirens and feeling great with each other all the time. Being okay with not liking each other sometimes, not understanding each other. But being committed to understanding why. What’s underneath our not so cheerful, perfect smiles?

It’s about asking if our values are aligned. If we are moving in the same direction. If we’ve let all the good things about our relationship go. If we stopped trying and why. 

That is the kind of truth we are being called to look at. Are we trading our fear of loneliness for what we value? And if so, how can we begin to bring those things back into alignment.

The same thing applies to looking for love. Getting radically honest about what that means to us.

Because love does not begin with another person. It begins with the courage to see ourselves clearly. And that courage comes from awareness, acceptance and grace.

This is the doorway the Alchemy Room holds open for you.

Not formulas. Not gimmicks or games.. Just a place to slow down and feel what has been waiting for your attention.

Oh, BTW.. Justin Long’s character fails to notice that in all of his ponderings and lectures, he’s fallen for GG in a big way.

And that’s what happens when we are not afraid to be authentic, genuine and full of our badass self.